I have such a "moment;" a moment that was such a special time, shared with someone very dear to me. I sometimes wonder if it really happened or if it was a dream. I know if I died today, that I would die knowing that at that moment in time I was truly as happy as anyone could ever be, I was fulfilled, and I shared that special connection with someone whom I loved and who returned that love.
My love lives half a Continent away. Like many relationships today, our relationship started in cyber space. After several weeks the relationship progressed from "computer chat" to telephone conversations. Our first telephone conversation amazed both of us; it lasted through the night and we watched the gray fingers of dawn spread across the night sky. We shared many sunrises after that, half a continent apart, but so close emotionally.
Every moment I spent with him, whether online, on the phone, or in person was special. From our first meeting, we connected, just as my intuition had told me we would. But this connection was unlike any other either of us had ever experienced. With each phone call and meeting, that bond became stronger -- much stronger than I think either of us had realized was possible. My "moment in time" occurred during our last meeting. I have a quote listed in my collection of quotes: "A kiss on the beach while watching the sun set on the horizon is the closest you can get to heaven while still on earth" - SLG. It is from my "moment in time" that this quote originated.
We had three glorious days and nights to spend together. We spent as much time alone as we could; not leaving each other's side for more that a few moments. He did, however, have the opportunity to meet my impassive 4-year-old, who willingly climbed into my love's lap, comfortable in the safety, kindness, and warmth that he felt emanating from this special man. This interaction between my love and my child reinforced what I already knew --- my love was indeed extraordinary
We spent our time together doing special things we enjoyed, such as hiking along a nature trail, enjoying the quiet solitude provided by nature's setting. Our last day together, we decided to go to the beach. The weather was cool, almost cold. We arrived at the beach just as the sun was setting, our timing was perfect, for we both wanted to watch the sunset on the beach. As the sun made it's way towards the water's edge, we walked along the beach. The tide was out, and we walked and waded through puddles of water and cold, wet sand with our jeans rolled up to our knees and our feet bare. The water was as cold as that from a mountain stream high in the Andes. Walking along the beach, joking about swimming in the frigid water, watching the gulls diving for food, and stopping frequently to share kisses and caresses, the rest of the world slowly faded and we were alone but for the cool breeze, the sun, sand, water, and the sea gulls.
As the sun reached a point on the horizon that it began to disappear, we sat on the sand and watched. We were surrounded by the warm, golden-reddish glow from the setting sun as it slowly disappeared beyond the horizon, into the water. Mesmerized by the beauty of the sunset, the beach, and the emotions we felt for one another; it was almost as though we were no longer of this earth, but set apart in our own world. Long after the sun had disappeared we sat on the beach, holding each other, kissing, and staring deeply into each other's eyes -- seeing into each other's soul.
Later in the hotel room, we expressed our love for one another. I would say that we "made love," but that doesn't adequately describe what transpired between us. It went beyond anything physical and emotional. Even to say that it was a spiritual experience seems insufficient. We WERE one; one heart, one soul, one being. We sat on the bed and talked for hours; detached from the world. Nothing existed but us in that moment in time. We both prayed that time would stand still, for everything to stop so we could stay in this Utopian cocoon that had been spun around us.
We laughed; and we cried, for a future that could not exist -- would never exist for us. You see, cultural differences make that impossible. What many people fail to understand is that I respect his beliefs and his culture, and would never ask him to go against traditions and culture that are so ingrained in his being. I love him too much.
But I know that whatever the future holds for either of us, I will always have my "moment in time" lovingly stored in my memory. A place I can escape in my mind and relive those feelings and that special connection he and I shared; for I know, neither of us may ever have that connection or that "moment" again, with anyone else.
©Copyright 2000
SLG
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